28 July 2011
25 July 2011
Random
Cepatlah masa berlalu.
Habis belajar.
Bertunang and sambung belajar.
Or kahwin and sambung belajar.
Or sambung belajar, bertunang and kahwin.
Bilalah aku boleh berkhidmat sebagai seorang pensyarah Matematik?
Ok. Random.
Tapi aku dah bercita-cita begitu.
Aku tetap dengan perancanganku.
Matematik dan diriku tak dapat dipisah.
Jangan kata aku sudah tersalah pilihan sekarang.
Sesungguhnya Allah telah tetapkan perjalanan hidup kita.
Kita hanya mampu merancang.
Ada hikmah di sebalik sesuatu yang berlaku.
Aku terima dengan redha.
Sekarang aku tinggal laksanakan apa yang perlu.
Belajar, buat persiapan diri, menjaga hati dan terus berdoa. Itu sahaja.
Dengan empat perkara ini, InsyaAllah segala impian akan tercapai.
Sebelum aku melalut lebih panjang, baik aku berundur diri.
Assalamualaikum and thank you for reading.:)
Habis belajar.
Bertunang and sambung belajar.
Or kahwin and sambung belajar.
Or sambung belajar, bertunang and kahwin.
Bilalah aku boleh berkhidmat sebagai seorang pensyarah Matematik?
Ok. Random.
Tapi aku dah bercita-cita begitu.
Aku tetap dengan perancanganku.
Matematik dan diriku tak dapat dipisah.
Jangan kata aku sudah tersalah pilihan sekarang.
Sesungguhnya Allah telah tetapkan perjalanan hidup kita.
Kita hanya mampu merancang.
Ada hikmah di sebalik sesuatu yang berlaku.
Aku terima dengan redha.
Sekarang aku tinggal laksanakan apa yang perlu.
Belajar, buat persiapan diri, menjaga hati dan terus berdoa. Itu sahaja.
Dengan empat perkara ini, InsyaAllah segala impian akan tercapai.
Sebelum aku melalut lebih panjang, baik aku berundur diri.
Assalamualaikum and thank you for reading.:)
21 July 2011
Luahan Seorang Wanita
Assalamualaikum... Apa khabar?!:)
Ini ada satu kisah ingin dikongsi. Walaupun saya belum berumahtangga, tetapi ini sekadar untuk renungan. Especially men, fahamilah sikap wanita yang kuat cemburu. Itulah lumrah bercinta, adakalanya, hati kita akan disakiti. Meh2!
http://www.iluvislam.com/keluarga/perkahwinan/3166-risaunya-hati.html
Benar, wanita ini kuat cemburu. Heheh. Biasalahlah... Hati perempuan ni sensitive. So boys, do take care of your girl's heart.;) Thank you for reading!
Assalamualaikum, daaaaaaaa~~
Ini ada satu kisah ingin dikongsi. Walaupun saya belum berumahtangga, tetapi ini sekadar untuk renungan. Especially men, fahamilah sikap wanita yang kuat cemburu. Itulah lumrah bercinta, adakalanya, hati kita akan disakiti. Meh2!
http://www.iluvislam.com/keluarga/perkahwinan/3166-risaunya-hati.html
Benar, wanita ini kuat cemburu. Heheh. Biasalahlah... Hati perempuan ni sensitive. So boys, do take care of your girl's heart.;) Thank you for reading!
Assalamualaikum, daaaaaaaa~~
20 July 2011
Her Diamonds ;)
Assalamualaikum, selamat sejahtera everyone!
Let's have a little flashback. It was BEL class. Miss Diane taught us about listening skills for a few classes. And so ada this one day, she brought her speaker and gave out a piece of paper for each person, written with lyrics of a song. But there were blanks. We didn't know what song it was. So macam biasa lah before we sing, we made guesses how it sounds like. Everyone bantai the melody. Rap la, alun2 la. Then Miss Diane played the song and we had to fill in the blanks. Bila dengar the lyrics, it was sad that I almost cried. Because I understood the lyrics. Imagine, that was before I knew the story behind it. So let me give you the same experience like what I had. Listen to this first.:)
Haaaaaaa... Okay! Best tak? Best tak??!! The title is "Her Diamonds". So what do you think about this song? What is it all about? So begini cerita dia like what Miss Diane told us. Rob Thomas wrote this song for his wife and mother. At that moment both of them were sick. I don't know sakit apa. So he's feeling useless, feeling guilty because he can't do anything. He could only watch. And cry. Macam dalam lyrics kan?
Conclusionnya, buat lah lagu untuk orang yang sakit. So not!! Silap2 orang tu mati terus. Hahah. Just be at your loved ones' side when they're sick or in bad times. Understand them. Don't give unnecessary pressure until they become even more down. Walaupun dia kata macam lantak pi lah, but it doesn't mean you have to leave them menanggung kesusahan sorang2. Just that, give them some space. If I was him, memang aku pun kesedihan. Siapa sanggup tengok orang yang kita sayang sakit or disakiti? It does hurt myself too. I just berdoa that all my loved ones will always be fine. Because I might be like Rob Thomas. Feeling useless and not able to help. Hanya doa sahaja yang mampu diberikan. Thank you for reading.:)
Assalamualaikum and goodnight, goodnight!:)
Let's have a little flashback. It was BEL class. Miss Diane taught us about listening skills for a few classes. And so ada this one day, she brought her speaker and gave out a piece of paper for each person, written with lyrics of a song. But there were blanks. We didn't know what song it was. So macam biasa lah before we sing, we made guesses how it sounds like. Everyone bantai the melody. Rap la, alun2 la. Then Miss Diane played the song and we had to fill in the blanks. Bila dengar the lyrics, it was sad that I almost cried. Because I understood the lyrics. Imagine, that was before I knew the story behind it. So let me give you the same experience like what I had. Listen to this first.:)
Oh what the hell she says
I just can't win for losing
And she lays back down
Man there's so many times
I don't know what I'm doin'
Like I don't know now
By the light of the moon, she rubs her eyes
Says it's funny how the night can make you blind
I can just imagine
And I don't know what I'm supposed to do
But if she feels bad then I do too
So I let her be
And she says ooh I can't take no more
Her tears like diamonds on the floor
And her diamonds bring me down
Cause I can't help her now
She's down in it
She tried her best but now she can't win
It's hard to see them on the ground
Her diamonds falling down, way down
She sits down and stares into the distance
And it takes all night
And I know I could break her concentration
But it don't feel right
By the light of the moon, she rubs her eyes
Sits down on the bed and starts to cry
And there's something less about her
And I don't know what I'm supposed to do
So I sit down and I cry too
But don't let her see
And she says ooh, I can't take no more
Her tears like diamonds on the floor
And her diamonds bring me down
Cause I can't help her now
She's down in it
She tried her best but now she can't win
It's hard to see them on the ground
Her diamonds falling down
She shuts out the night
Tries to close her eyes
If she can find daylight
Then she'll be alright, she'll be alright
Just not tonight
And she says ooh, I can't take no more
Her tears like diamonds on the floor
And her diamonds bring me down
Cause I can't help her now
She's down in it
She tried her best but now she can't win
It's hard to see them on the ground
Her diamonds falling
Ooh, I can't take no more
Her tears like diamonds on the floor
But her diamonds bring me down
Cause I can't help her now
She's down in it
She tried her best but now she can't win
It's hard to see them on the ground
Her diamonds falling down
I can't take no more
Diamonds on the floor
No more, no more, no more
Diamonds falling down
I can't take no more
Diamonds on the floor
No more, no more, no more
Diamonds falling down
I can't take no more
Diamonds on the floor
(No more, no more)
Her diamonds falling, all her diamonds
Diamonds falling down
I can't take these diamonds falling down
Haaaaaaa... Okay! Best tak? Best tak??!! The title is "Her Diamonds". So what do you think about this song? What is it all about? So begini cerita dia like what Miss Diane told us. Rob Thomas wrote this song for his wife and mother. At that moment both of them were sick. I don't know sakit apa. So he's feeling useless, feeling guilty because he can't do anything. He could only watch. And cry. Macam dalam lyrics kan?
Conclusionnya, buat lah lagu untuk orang yang sakit. So not!! Silap2 orang tu mati terus. Hahah. Just be at your loved ones' side when they're sick or in bad times. Understand them. Don't give unnecessary pressure until they become even more down. Walaupun dia kata macam lantak pi lah, but it doesn't mean you have to leave them menanggung kesusahan sorang2. Just that, give them some space. If I was him, memang aku pun kesedihan. Siapa sanggup tengok orang yang kita sayang sakit or disakiti? It does hurt myself too. I just berdoa that all my loved ones will always be fine. Because I might be like Rob Thomas. Feeling useless and not able to help. Hanya doa sahaja yang mampu diberikan. Thank you for reading.:)
Assalamualaikum and goodnight, goodnight!:)
This is How We are!:)
This is how we are. Both love to listen to music. For the lyrics. Not the melody. And I get to listen you sing for me before I go to sleep. You're so sweet! And I just imagine we're in this. Yeah. So you just say, make me your radio.:))) But you'll always say, "You want me to sing, you be my wife!". Dapat gak to listen for free.:p Thank you for your singing. I looiiiikkkeee!!;)
19 July 2011
Stressed Out!!!
*FAINTS*
PHYSICS. I did the assignment since morning. Ok. Yeah. Dah cukup pening dah buat. And everyone's busy doing it. But nobody perasan yang dateline dia semalam. SO HOWWWWWWWW?????? DAH LAH BANYAK!! Kitorang buat pun slow. Punya lah cuak!! Rasa nak nangis dah. Markah ku terbang... Huuuuuu.....
Then Miss Puteri muncul di wall group D4Flat. There's a new official assignment. Due date: 24th July 2011. Rushingnya... Yang we did before was only for practice. Damnnnnnnnnnn.......................... Rasa nak pecahkan PC ni je sebab gembira + geram!!! Why didn't you told us sooooooooo!!! So much of worrying on that "practices" you have given!! Hahahahh. Mood tak stabil ni.:p Ok. Nak rest dah sekarang. Otakku sakit dah. Huuuuuuu..... I need my remedy...:'O
PHYSICS. I did the assignment since morning. Ok. Yeah. Dah cukup pening dah buat. And everyone's busy doing it. But nobody perasan yang dateline dia semalam. SO HOWWWWWWWW?????? DAH LAH BANYAK!! Kitorang buat pun slow. Punya lah cuak!! Rasa nak nangis dah. Markah ku terbang... Huuuuuu.....
Then Miss Puteri muncul di wall group D4Flat. There's a new official assignment. Due date: 24th July 2011. Rushingnya... Yang we did before was only for practice. Damnnnnnnnnnn.......................... Rasa nak pecahkan PC ni je sebab gembira + geram!!! Why didn't you told us sooooooooo!!! So much of worrying on that "practices" you have given!! Hahahahh. Mood tak stabil ni.:p Ok. Nak rest dah sekarang. Otakku sakit dah. Huuuuuuu..... I need my remedy...:'O
How I Learn about Love?
Assalamualaikum and good day!
Day lah sangat kan. Oh well... This post is something yang macam berbunga sikit. So if tak tahan dengan bunga2 ni, tak perlulah baca.:D Why lah kan suddenly I talk about this. Actually, I really love to watch Marimar and yesterday was the final episode. So sad!!:O At first I didn't follow the drama. But ada this one time I was so bored that I watched. Jarang2 lah nak tengok tv kat rumah ni. So after that one episode ended, I felt like watching it from the start.
So, episode 1. Belum berapa best but it ended with Marimar's life when she was separated from her parents and lost her memory. Suspense! I wanted to watch more. I really2 love that moment bila Marimar met Sergio. I imagined myself. Young and foolish. Didn't know how to hide my feelings when I was starstrucked! I just thought I have kept those feelings so deep inside but actually it was obvious and I thought that guy will never know what I felt. I don't know. I just feel like cerita Marimar is so different from any other love stories. Macam real lah how they acted it out. But in real life, the hero and heroin memang lovers and cinta berputik from that story. Comel kan??
The story was quite similar to what I am experiencing now. Happy, sad and happy again. Let me summarize this. So Marimar ni at first, fell in love with Sergio because he's charming. So was I. Hahah! Marimar is pretty!! Why he didn't like her too!! Urrrggghhh!! So Sergio didn't love Marimar. But wanted to marry her just because tercabar dengan his dad. Though he didn't love Marimar, but dia layan Marimar as if dia sayang sangat kat Marimar. Dia sanggup do anything for her as long as she's happy but without his love. Poor Marimar tak pernah tau that her marriage was fake and Sergio didn't love her. So was I. Allah sahaja tau what I felt when I knew about it. I thought I was "loved" but actually dikaburi dengan his charming acts.
But disebabkan Marimar ni give all her love for Sergio, lama2 Sergio pun sayang Marimar. There was this moment when they were stucked on an island nak honeymoon. Diorang gaduh, dua2 tak nak mengalah, pantang dicabar, nak survive on the island. But Marimar menang lah because dia memang biasa dengan island life. Then Sergio sakit, demam. Marimar at first try to tak layan but then rasa bersalah when Sergio betul2 sakit. And she took care of him. At that moment, barulah Sergio sedar that that girl loves him so much tapi cinta tak berbalas. Disebabkan rasa bersalah of biarkan Marimar bertepuk sebelah tangan, he tried to love her with all his heart. So was I.
Kalau ikutkan hati, I can be very furious like how Marimar was. And I've already shown it a bit. Terlalu banyak niat untuk tinggalkan this complicated relationship, because my heart was really broken into pieces. So I tried to ignore him and just forget whatever happened. Like how Marimar was embarrassed with what people had done to her, so was I. I was embarrassed of whatever stupid things I did in front of him. Macam orang bodoh syok sendiri. But end up loving each other despite the hardships they have gone through.
In that story, disebabkan Sergio ni charming and handsome, many girls sangkut dengan dia and tried to get his attention including his ex and his own friends. Mine's like that too. Charming until ramai sangat orang sangkut. Siapa tak risau?? That's why I can be very jealous and felt that tak mampu to keep him for a long time. Ada masanya dia gurau, kata he can just leave me. But he already said that he's trying to give his loyalty. Indeed he's charming and I could melt every single day.:) I was thinking, Marimar lawa tapi tak ada pun ramai lelaki terkejar-kejar kan dia? Only for her wealth. Tamak!
Basically, way before both of us knew each other, I learned a lot from that drama. Dah fikir dah, kalau macam ni nak buat apa, macam tu nak buat apa. Last2 memang I jump into that situation. I admit I'm not that romantic. I don't know how to make a guy melts like ice. I can never really do well whatever I have planned. If I did, it was sincere from my heart. I can't hide my feelings. All I know is to love that one person. The person that has my heart in his hands. Handle with care because it's fragile.;)
I realize that when both are so loyal and have so many in commons, it might help you to stay in a relationship longer. Especially in communicating each other. As for me, both of us memang talkative, hyper and kuat bergurau senda. Entahlah. Memang I never get bored. Everyday ada je topic yang nak dikatakan. Bila bercakap tu memang susah nak stop. Hahah! I just have a strong feeling that this will be a long journey. Itu semua usaha sendiri and takdir. Takdir yang menentukan. But just go with the flow. Stay positive.
If you're sincere enough, things will come naturally. No scripts, no practices. All from the heart. The heart that controls your act when you're just too in love. That's why kadang2 boleh terkeluar words that can make your loved one mesmerized. And bila dah tercakap, kita sendiri terkejut with what we did. As if those things are involuntary acts. I admit I never have a relationship like this. Very relax, not having pressure of promises and oaths, not too obsessive where we think we fully own our partner that we can't even let him or her go and full of understanding.
Guys, just be sweet to your girls. That's the only thing they want. Your attention. Tak tau lah if ada those yang kejar for your money and popularity. Show that you give attention to her. Remember important events like tests or competitions, wish them luck! Girls love guys yang ingat what she'll be having. Tak perlu nak ulang banyak kali and lupa lagi macam orang nyanyok. Kalau macam tu baik aku cakap dengan nenek aku. Lagi bagus! Oh yeah! And be a guy who's full of surprises. It won't make your love life boring. Girls like fun guys. So if you can entertain them, then you're fun enough! Kot. So far I'm having things under control. So we're doing good! Nak tau ke siapa dia ni? Ahaks! Keep it a mystery.;)
Again, melalut sangat dah ni. I'm deeply in love? Not really. Not that deep because it doesn't hurt much yet. How I learn about love and some tips to win her heart and take good care of it. Enough?? Ok. Tak perlu lah nak ego sangat if you can't accept this fact. Then go suffer in love with your wrong ways. You're suffering and the other one's suffering too. So kalau macam tu, better break up and get a life. A happier life. Make your choice. Tak semestinya having a partner makes your life happy. It depends on how you handle it. Choose wisely or you suffer. Oh, you! If you're reading this, this is part of what I said - write about you. Not obvious enough...:S Good then! And sorry if it gives a bit sad emotion because you know I was sad. Heheh.
One more thing, I remember what my Ustaz time SPM dulu, Ustaz Damin said. Jodoh tu tak semestinya seseorang yang kita perlu tunggu nak datang kat kita. Bukannya seseorang yang dah memang dah tetap untuk kita. Maksudnya bukan that particular person tu yang harus kita cari dalam hidup kita. It can be anyone. Walaupun sebenarnya jodoh tu dah diketahui. Sebab Allah membenarkan hamba-Nya mengusahakannya sendiri. Katakanlah dah tertulis jodoh kita dengan A, tapi kita tengah bercinta dengan orang B. And kita sangka orang B tu jodoh kita. Kan?? Nanti tiba2 boleh break up dengan orang B and bersama pula dengan orang A and kekal bahagia. Hahah! Kita boleh cari jodoh tu dengan cara niat dalam hati. Contohnya, kalau lelaki ada nampak perempuan yang dia minat, at that time, just niat, kalau perempuan ni pandang aku, maknanya dia jodoh aku. Kalau orang sekadar terpandang tu janganlah perasan lak. Ini apa yang Ustaz saya katakan. So it's up to you to believe or not. Saya sekadar menyampaikan.
Or you may have a look here. http://www.iluvislam.com/keluarga/perkahwinan/1726-jodoh-mencari-atau-menunggu.html
Thank you for reading this!:)
Assalamualaikum and have a nice day.:)
Day lah sangat kan. Oh well... This post is something yang macam berbunga sikit. So if tak tahan dengan bunga2 ni, tak perlulah baca.:D Why lah kan suddenly I talk about this. Actually, I really love to watch Marimar and yesterday was the final episode. So sad!!:O At first I didn't follow the drama. But ada this one time I was so bored that I watched. Jarang2 lah nak tengok tv kat rumah ni. So after that one episode ended, I felt like watching it from the start.
So, episode 1. Belum berapa best but it ended with Marimar's life when she was separated from her parents and lost her memory. Suspense! I wanted to watch more. I really2 love that moment bila Marimar met Sergio. I imagined myself. Young and foolish. Didn't know how to hide my feelings when I was starstrucked! I just thought I have kept those feelings so deep inside but actually it was obvious and I thought that guy will never know what I felt. I don't know. I just feel like cerita Marimar is so different from any other love stories. Macam real lah how they acted it out. But in real life, the hero and heroin memang lovers and cinta berputik from that story. Comel kan??
The story was quite similar to what I am experiencing now. Happy, sad and happy again. Let me summarize this. So Marimar ni at first, fell in love with Sergio because he's charming. So was I. Hahah! Marimar is pretty!! Why he didn't like her too!! Urrrggghhh!! So Sergio didn't love Marimar. But wanted to marry her just because tercabar dengan his dad. Though he didn't love Marimar, but dia layan Marimar as if dia sayang sangat kat Marimar. Dia sanggup do anything for her as long as she's happy but without his love. Poor Marimar tak pernah tau that her marriage was fake and Sergio didn't love her. So was I. Allah sahaja tau what I felt when I knew about it. I thought I was "loved" but actually dikaburi dengan his charming acts.
But disebabkan Marimar ni give all her love for Sergio, lama2 Sergio pun sayang Marimar. There was this moment when they were stucked on an island nak honeymoon. Diorang gaduh, dua2 tak nak mengalah, pantang dicabar, nak survive on the island. But Marimar menang lah because dia memang biasa dengan island life. Then Sergio sakit, demam. Marimar at first try to tak layan but then rasa bersalah when Sergio betul2 sakit. And she took care of him. At that moment, barulah Sergio sedar that that girl loves him so much tapi cinta tak berbalas. Disebabkan rasa bersalah of biarkan Marimar bertepuk sebelah tangan, he tried to love her with all his heart. So was I.
Kalau ikutkan hati, I can be very furious like how Marimar was. And I've already shown it a bit. Terlalu banyak niat untuk tinggalkan this complicated relationship, because my heart was really broken into pieces. So I tried to ignore him and just forget whatever happened. Like how Marimar was embarrassed with what people had done to her, so was I. I was embarrassed of whatever stupid things I did in front of him. Macam orang bodoh syok sendiri. But end up loving each other despite the hardships they have gone through.
In that story, disebabkan Sergio ni charming and handsome, many girls sangkut dengan dia and tried to get his attention including his ex and his own friends. Mine's like that too. Charming until ramai sangat orang sangkut. Siapa tak risau?? That's why I can be very jealous and felt that tak mampu to keep him for a long time. Ada masanya dia gurau, kata he can just leave me. But he already said that he's trying to give his loyalty. Indeed he's charming and I could melt every single day.:) I was thinking, Marimar lawa tapi tak ada pun ramai lelaki terkejar-kejar kan dia? Only for her wealth. Tamak!
Basically, way before both of us knew each other, I learned a lot from that drama. Dah fikir dah, kalau macam ni nak buat apa, macam tu nak buat apa. Last2 memang I jump into that situation. I admit I'm not that romantic. I don't know how to make a guy melts like ice. I can never really do well whatever I have planned. If I did, it was sincere from my heart. I can't hide my feelings. All I know is to love that one person. The person that has my heart in his hands. Handle with care because it's fragile.;)
I realize that when both are so loyal and have so many in commons, it might help you to stay in a relationship longer. Especially in communicating each other. As for me, both of us memang talkative, hyper and kuat bergurau senda. Entahlah. Memang I never get bored. Everyday ada je topic yang nak dikatakan. Bila bercakap tu memang susah nak stop. Hahah! I just have a strong feeling that this will be a long journey. Itu semua usaha sendiri and takdir. Takdir yang menentukan. But just go with the flow. Stay positive.
If you're sincere enough, things will come naturally. No scripts, no practices. All from the heart. The heart that controls your act when you're just too in love. That's why kadang2 boleh terkeluar words that can make your loved one mesmerized. And bila dah tercakap, kita sendiri terkejut with what we did. As if those things are involuntary acts. I admit I never have a relationship like this. Very relax, not having pressure of promises and oaths, not too obsessive where we think we fully own our partner that we can't even let him or her go and full of understanding.
Guys, just be sweet to your girls. That's the only thing they want. Your attention. Tak tau lah if ada those yang kejar for your money and popularity. Show that you give attention to her. Remember important events like tests or competitions, wish them luck! Girls love guys yang ingat what she'll be having. Tak perlu nak ulang banyak kali and lupa lagi macam orang nyanyok. Kalau macam tu baik aku cakap dengan nenek aku. Lagi bagus! Oh yeah! And be a guy who's full of surprises. It won't make your love life boring. Girls like fun guys. So if you can entertain them, then you're fun enough! Kot. So far I'm having things under control. So we're doing good! Nak tau ke siapa dia ni? Ahaks! Keep it a mystery.;)
Again, melalut sangat dah ni. I'm deeply in love? Not really. Not that deep because it doesn't hurt much yet. How I learn about love and some tips to win her heart and take good care of it. Enough?? Ok. Tak perlu lah nak ego sangat if you can't accept this fact. Then go suffer in love with your wrong ways. You're suffering and the other one's suffering too. So kalau macam tu, better break up and get a life. A happier life. Make your choice. Tak semestinya having a partner makes your life happy. It depends on how you handle it. Choose wisely or you suffer. Oh, you! If you're reading this, this is part of what I said - write about you. Not obvious enough...:S Good then! And sorry if it gives a bit sad emotion because you know I was sad. Heheh.
One more thing, I remember what my Ustaz time SPM dulu, Ustaz Damin said. Jodoh tu tak semestinya seseorang yang kita perlu tunggu nak datang kat kita. Bukannya seseorang yang dah memang dah tetap untuk kita. Maksudnya bukan that particular person tu yang harus kita cari dalam hidup kita. It can be anyone. Walaupun sebenarnya jodoh tu dah diketahui. Sebab Allah membenarkan hamba-Nya mengusahakannya sendiri. Katakanlah dah tertulis jodoh kita dengan A, tapi kita tengah bercinta dengan orang B. And kita sangka orang B tu jodoh kita. Kan?? Nanti tiba2 boleh break up dengan orang B and bersama pula dengan orang A and kekal bahagia. Hahah! Kita boleh cari jodoh tu dengan cara niat dalam hati. Contohnya, kalau lelaki ada nampak perempuan yang dia minat, at that time, just niat, kalau perempuan ni pandang aku, maknanya dia jodoh aku. Kalau orang sekadar terpandang tu janganlah perasan lak. Ini apa yang Ustaz saya katakan. So it's up to you to believe or not. Saya sekadar menyampaikan.
Or you may have a look here. http://www.iluvislam.com/keluarga/perkahwinan/1726-jodoh-mencari-atau-menunggu.html
Thank you for reading this!:)
Assalamualaikum and have a nice day.:)
18 July 2011
Sympathy is the Word
Assalamualaikum and good day everyone!
I'm a bit in a sympathy mood. You know why? Ok. So let me start from the beginning. Disebabkan my parents and I were exhausted last night balik quite late from this one jamuan. And nenek ada di rumah sebab my aunt's currently busy dengan husband dia yang sakit. So kami lah yang jaga dia. My grandma ni pun sakit. Stroke. Can't walk but boleh gerak dalam posisi duduk and push herself forward. Is there any term for that? Urrrgggghhhh.... I'm not good at language.=_= That's why she needs care from us. Mandikan, bagi makan, pakaikan pampers and yada yada... It's difficult nak uruskan dia when it comes to mandi time. Otherwise, she just sits or lie down, not being able to do much.
So, what about today? This morning since everyone was exhausted, we woke up late at 6.30 am. Ayah and ibu were rushing to get themselves ready to work. And I'm all alone with nenek. As I woke up, I saw nenek heading to the toilet, rushing too to mandi before my parents went out. If not she'll be left unmanaged. Takkan nak harap aku terkontang kanting uruskan dia sorang2?? However it ended up like that because my parents were late for work.
When my parents went out, my grandma was having her bath. Before they left, diorang ada pesan to do this and that. And at that moment, I was feeling a bit dizzy because slept late. Hekhek. Kalau ikutkan hati, tak laratnya nak menguruskan nenek aku tu. But when I saw her done bathing and waiting for someone to uruskan dia, I felt sad, sympathy. Those feelings did overcome kepenatan yang dirasai dalam diri. So I quickly grab her clean clothes and towel. Aku yang tak berapa kuat ni, guna segala kudrat yang ada nak angkat dia naik ke tempat lebih tinggi. You know, in a house you have floor yang ada naik sikit by one or two steps. Ahah. Like that la. So hard to explain.:S Ok. Then lapkan badan dia pakaikan bedak, pakaikan baju dia and she moved all by herself back to her resting place.
Bila fikir mandi dah selesai, bilik air belum kemas, tempat tidur dia belum kemas, breakfast tak ada. Pening2. Fikir2, kalau buat breakfast, nanti nenek dah sampai kat tempat tidur dia, belum dikemas. Nanti bila kemas2, dia dah sampai, lapar lak dia. Because my grandma always tell me she feels hungry sampai menggeletar. Cuak lak kalau pape jadi! Memang aku berlari-lari kelam kabut. At least like normal mornings, my parents settle her together. Now I'm all alone. Hah! Ingat senang ke nak jaga orang sakit. Now I feel what my parents always feel. Tu baru tanggungan nenek. Bayangkan kalau ada anak kecik2 lagi, pagi2 sibuk nak g sekolah. Bayangkan orang tu ayah or ibu tunggal. Pening gak eh... Nasib baiklah aku dah besar. Tak perlu nak fikir apa dah. Sendiri urus.
Settlekan breakfast, buat air dulu. Ayah said he'll buy breakfast. Ok. But then gula habis, entah ibu simpan mana. Tercari-cari. Tangguh kejap. Then kemas tempat dia. Right on time! Then nenek nak naik to a higher place. So, angkat dia lagi. Memang keluar lah muscles2 ni. Heheheh! So now, sesi menggeledah kabinet! Gula....!!! Found it! Air done. Usually after nenek mandi, nak kena pakaikan dia pampers. So pakaikanlah. And dia cakap, terima kasih dengan nada yang amat berterima kasih. I just smile and say, sama2. Apa lagi yang aku boleh buatkan untuk dia sementara dia masih hidup ni, kalau tak jaga dia dengan sebaiknya.:) Then dia kata lapar sampai menggeletar. Nak nasi. I was like. Don't freak me out. Jangan pengsan dulu!! Fine!! Luckily nasi dah ada. Lauk tak ada. As usual, dia suka makan ayam, gorengkan lah drumet Ayamas tu.
Before goreng tu, I fed my neighbour's cats. Dah bising sangat mintak2 makan. So bagilah makan. Bagi makan Friskies. Tapi bila bau ayam, bising2 mintak ayam. Demanding betul lah kucing ni!! Pastu kucing tak nak mengalah. Pergi manja2 dengan kita lak dengan harapan dapat ayam yang sedap tu. I said, NO WAY!! Ayam siap, bagi nenek makan. Then nenek tanya, "Cakap dengan sape tadi??". Errrhhh... "Kucing."=_= So sementara tunggu nenek siap makan, I cleaned up the bathroom. Buang pampers nenek yang dah guna, bersihkan lantai... And basuh baju yang bertimbun. Dah selesai kerja. Layan lah kucing2 ni jap. Dah hilang ngantok.
That's my morning today and might happen again if terlajak lagi pagi2. Here, I'm not trying to tell my routine. I'm trying to tell my experience jaga orang tua ni. Untunglah nenek aku sebab masih ada yang sayang and take care of her. Unlike zaman sekarang yang dah makin berlambak Si Tenggang. Tell me why do they neglect their parents when they're old? Nak kata menyusahkan orang yang jaga? For me, tidak sama sekali! When you're sincere in whatever you do, you don't even feel the exhaustion, pain. Instead, you feel the joy and happiness of doing something to benefit others. Lagi2 for our loved ones. Such a pain to see them suffer, seeing them struggling to do what they are not capable of. Rasa nak angkat, rasa nak... Do anything for them lah!
Why do some people don't realize that their parents suffer so much and send them to rumah orang tua atas alasan susah nak jaga sendiri? Maybe if they let anyone else to take care for their parents while they're working is still fine. But ada yang melampau sangat tak jenguk langsung! A bit emotional lak. Sorry... I can easily read people's expressions. So bila tengok nenek, I can see pain. And I give her my sympathy. Where do those people put their sympathies? Sebab diorang tak pernah nak pandang their parents' faces la jadi macam tu kan? You know that when you can see pain, you feel like crying, thinking what they are going through. Pain makes you have a heart for others. Pain makes you learn to love others.
Ingatlah, when we were babies, we were not capable of doing everything like walking or talking. You were trying to say something to the people around you but they don't understand you. But you have your mother who understands you the most through your actions. When you're in pain, you cry and you have your mother to calm you down. When we were babies, we were giving so much trouble to our parents. But they never complained. They give you more love instead. So why not we do the same thing to our parents when they're old? My story is only to show that if I can do it all by myself, why not those yang adik beradik ramai can't even take care of their parents when they're old and sick?
Tak perlu nak berkira kemampuan harta just because we have to spend so much on our parents' welfare. Think about it. When we were young, our parents have spent so much on us. So a little spending doesn't hurt much. Right? And if possible, start to be independent from now. Don't ask so much money from our parents when you wanna use it for joli2 sakan. They have worked hard for every Ringgit. So don't waste it. As for me, I have my own savings. So kalau nak joli2 sakan, I use my own money. If my parents give me money, I use it for food and university expenses. When your parents give you money, look into their faces. Do they smile or macam nak tak nak bagi je? My mum always give me that look. That look yang.... There goes my money!! And I hope she uses it wisely. So I was like, ok. I just take it and never ask for more. Even if they ask ada duit lagi tak, I just say ada if dah habis pun. Because I know I have my own savings. Which I have earned so hard. Just like how my parents earn their money. Rugi lah kan dah penat2 usahakan duit tu pastu habis macam tu je.
So, ok. I just make my topic today merangkumi sympathy for parents and old people. Susah nak stop if I have so many ideas. My bad for the long loooooonnngggg entry. It's just something to ponder upon. Things like this can make us beringat sentiasa supaya tak terpesong jauh dari jalan yang benar. InsyaAllah kita akan sentiasa jadi manusia yang berguna di muka Bumi ini. Bukan jadi sampah masyarakat. Thank you for reading!:)
Assalamualaikum and daaaaaaa~~
I'm a bit in a sympathy mood. You know why? Ok. So let me start from the beginning. Disebabkan my parents and I were exhausted last night balik quite late from this one jamuan. And nenek ada di rumah sebab my aunt's currently busy dengan husband dia yang sakit. So kami lah yang jaga dia. My grandma ni pun sakit. Stroke. Can't walk but boleh gerak dalam posisi duduk and push herself forward. Is there any term for that? Urrrgggghhhh.... I'm not good at language.=_= That's why she needs care from us. Mandikan, bagi makan, pakaikan pampers and yada yada... It's difficult nak uruskan dia when it comes to mandi time. Otherwise, she just sits or lie down, not being able to do much.
So, what about today? This morning since everyone was exhausted, we woke up late at 6.30 am. Ayah and ibu were rushing to get themselves ready to work. And I'm all alone with nenek. As I woke up, I saw nenek heading to the toilet, rushing too to mandi before my parents went out. If not she'll be left unmanaged. Takkan nak harap aku terkontang kanting uruskan dia sorang2?? However it ended up like that because my parents were late for work.
Nenek.:)
Bila fikir mandi dah selesai, bilik air belum kemas, tempat tidur dia belum kemas, breakfast tak ada. Pening2. Fikir2, kalau buat breakfast, nanti nenek dah sampai kat tempat tidur dia, belum dikemas. Nanti bila kemas2, dia dah sampai, lapar lak dia. Because my grandma always tell me she feels hungry sampai menggeletar. Cuak lak kalau pape jadi! Memang aku berlari-lari kelam kabut. At least like normal mornings, my parents settle her together. Now I'm all alone. Hah! Ingat senang ke nak jaga orang sakit. Now I feel what my parents always feel. Tu baru tanggungan nenek. Bayangkan kalau ada anak kecik2 lagi, pagi2 sibuk nak g sekolah. Bayangkan orang tu ayah or ibu tunggal. Pening gak eh... Nasib baiklah aku dah besar. Tak perlu nak fikir apa dah. Sendiri urus.
Settlekan breakfast, buat air dulu. Ayah said he'll buy breakfast. Ok. But then gula habis, entah ibu simpan mana. Tercari-cari. Tangguh kejap. Then kemas tempat dia. Right on time! Then nenek nak naik to a higher place. So, angkat dia lagi. Memang keluar lah muscles2 ni. Heheheh! So now, sesi menggeledah kabinet! Gula....!!! Found it! Air done. Usually after nenek mandi, nak kena pakaikan dia pampers. So pakaikanlah. And dia cakap, terima kasih dengan nada yang amat berterima kasih. I just smile and say, sama2. Apa lagi yang aku boleh buatkan untuk dia sementara dia masih hidup ni, kalau tak jaga dia dengan sebaiknya.:) Then dia kata lapar sampai menggeletar. Nak nasi. I was like. Don't freak me out. Jangan pengsan dulu!! Fine!! Luckily nasi dah ada. Lauk tak ada. As usual, dia suka makan ayam, gorengkan lah drumet Ayamas tu.
Before goreng tu, I fed my neighbour's cats. Dah bising sangat mintak2 makan. So bagilah makan. Bagi makan Friskies. Tapi bila bau ayam, bising2 mintak ayam. Demanding betul lah kucing ni!! Pastu kucing tak nak mengalah. Pergi manja2 dengan kita lak dengan harapan dapat ayam yang sedap tu. I said, NO WAY!! Ayam siap, bagi nenek makan. Then nenek tanya, "Cakap dengan sape tadi??". Errrhhh... "Kucing."=_= So sementara tunggu nenek siap makan, I cleaned up the bathroom. Buang pampers nenek yang dah guna, bersihkan lantai... And basuh baju yang bertimbun. Dah selesai kerja. Layan lah kucing2 ni jap. Dah hilang ngantok.
That's my morning today and might happen again if terlajak lagi pagi2. Here, I'm not trying to tell my routine. I'm trying to tell my experience jaga orang tua ni. Untunglah nenek aku sebab masih ada yang sayang and take care of her. Unlike zaman sekarang yang dah makin berlambak Si Tenggang. Tell me why do they neglect their parents when they're old? Nak kata menyusahkan orang yang jaga? For me, tidak sama sekali! When you're sincere in whatever you do, you don't even feel the exhaustion, pain. Instead, you feel the joy and happiness of doing something to benefit others. Lagi2 for our loved ones. Such a pain to see them suffer, seeing them struggling to do what they are not capable of. Rasa nak angkat, rasa nak... Do anything for them lah!
Why do some people don't realize that their parents suffer so much and send them to rumah orang tua atas alasan susah nak jaga sendiri? Maybe if they let anyone else to take care for their parents while they're working is still fine. But ada yang melampau sangat tak jenguk langsung! A bit emotional lak. Sorry... I can easily read people's expressions. So bila tengok nenek, I can see pain. And I give her my sympathy. Where do those people put their sympathies? Sebab diorang tak pernah nak pandang their parents' faces la jadi macam tu kan? You know that when you can see pain, you feel like crying, thinking what they are going through. Pain makes you have a heart for others. Pain makes you learn to love others.
Ingatlah, when we were babies, we were not capable of doing everything like walking or talking. You were trying to say something to the people around you but they don't understand you. But you have your mother who understands you the most through your actions. When you're in pain, you cry and you have your mother to calm you down. When we were babies, we were giving so much trouble to our parents. But they never complained. They give you more love instead. So why not we do the same thing to our parents when they're old? My story is only to show that if I can do it all by myself, why not those yang adik beradik ramai can't even take care of their parents when they're old and sick?
Tak perlu nak berkira kemampuan harta just because we have to spend so much on our parents' welfare. Think about it. When we were young, our parents have spent so much on us. So a little spending doesn't hurt much. Right? And if possible, start to be independent from now. Don't ask so much money from our parents when you wanna use it for joli2 sakan. They have worked hard for every Ringgit. So don't waste it. As for me, I have my own savings. So kalau nak joli2 sakan, I use my own money. If my parents give me money, I use it for food and university expenses. When your parents give you money, look into their faces. Do they smile or macam nak tak nak bagi je? My mum always give me that look. That look yang.... There goes my money!! And I hope she uses it wisely. So I was like, ok. I just take it and never ask for more. Even if they ask ada duit lagi tak, I just say ada if dah habis pun. Because I know I have my own savings. Which I have earned so hard. Just like how my parents earn their money. Rugi lah kan dah penat2 usahakan duit tu pastu habis macam tu je.
So, ok. I just make my topic today merangkumi sympathy for parents and old people. Susah nak stop if I have so many ideas. My bad for the long loooooonnngggg entry. It's just something to ponder upon. Things like this can make us beringat sentiasa supaya tak terpesong jauh dari jalan yang benar. InsyaAllah kita akan sentiasa jadi manusia yang berguna di muka Bumi ini. Bukan jadi sampah masyarakat. Thank you for reading!:)
Assalamualaikum and daaaaaaa~~
14 July 2011
Listen to this!
Assalamualaikum and good day Earthlings!
I just want to apologize for not updating my blog for quite some time because I'm busy with tests and works. Running out of ideas too. But still thinking what to tell the world. Trying to have some flashbacks, observing people around here (not stalking) and finding something good to ponder on. So, next week I'll be quite free and have some time to get ideas and write my thoughts and experience. MID-SEM BREAK!!! WOOHOOOO!!! In!! Out!! In!! Out!! Haaaaahhhh... Relieved! It's Thursday already. Jom puasa! Tomorrow's Friday and Saturday comes afterwards. LAME REBECCA BLACK! Hehe. Till we meet again. Adios!:)
I just want to apologize for not updating my blog for quite some time because I'm busy with tests and works. Running out of ideas too. But still thinking what to tell the world. Trying to have some flashbacks, observing people around here (not stalking) and finding something good to ponder on. So, next week I'll be quite free and have some time to get ideas and write my thoughts and experience. MID-SEM BREAK!!! WOOHOOOO!!! In!! Out!! In!! Out!! Haaaaahhhh... Relieved! It's Thursday already. Jom puasa! Tomorrow's Friday and Saturday comes afterwards. LAME REBECCA BLACK! Hehe. Till we meet again. Adios!:)
5 July 2011
Not all girls are the same. I am different.
Assalamualaikum and hello!:)
Girls. People may say that girls are all the same. I don't think so. Me myself a girl but at times I don't really like what other girls do. Boys may define girls as "gedik". Think again. Am I like that? Ahaks! So perasan. If I'm like that, what about girls that are even more "gedik" than me? I think I'm neutral. Neutral in a way saya tidak memihak kepada lelaki atau perempuan walaupun perlu mempertahankan kaum sendiri. Faham maksud saya?
Tidak? Baiklah. Girls. Who doesn't like to be a girl? Bak kata Ustazah Idha, perempuan senang sangat nak masuk syurga, tapi lagi senang nak masuk neraka. At that moment, bila dengar, rasa cuak lah gak. Apa yang perlu dilakukan memanglah senang. Obey Allah, parents, husband, puasa, solat cukup, tutup aurat and etc. Tapi nak jaga amatlah sukar. Even orang yang amat kuat imannya pun boleh tersilap, apatah lagi kita yang masih goyah? Bersikap lembut tapi tak semestinya lemah. Malah perempuan ni amatlah dilindungi. Untung kan? Ada ke perempuan yang melindungi lelaki? Gangster kot perempuan tu. Laki dia wimp.=_=
As for me, Alhamdulilah dilahirkan sebagai seorang perempuan. I always believe in one thing. Girls are all pretty. Allah dah ciptakan semua makhluk-Nya cantik2. So tak perlulah pandang cermin and cakap muka buruk. Instead, say Alhamdulilah! Nak humble tu humble lah gak but tak perlulah until we have low self-esteem. Nak tunjuk muka pun malu sebab kata buruk sangat. Nonsense! Percaya kan even if a girl is not that pretty but she can always be pretty. Tak perlulah secara luaran. Dalaman pun dah cukup. Even when I myself see a girl yang baik sangat perangainya, I'll say she's beautiful. I do envy those people. Trying to be one. Still in the making. Dah lah sopan santun, lemah lembut, senyum setiap masa, perangai pun buat perangai 100% perempuan. Unlike me, I admit I don't behave at times. Yelaa... Ejek orang, kutuk orang, mengumpat, cakap merepek. But cakap merepek is on top of my list. Yang others tu ikut mood lah. Masya-Allah. Tak baiknya aku ni...
But that's the furthest I can go I guess. Alhamdulilah tak ada lah kritikal sangat aku ni, though dulu zaman sekolah rendah, aku ni amatlah tomboy. Kisah benar ni! Rambut potong pendek, pakai seluar pendek, kawan dengan lelaki. Mujurlah itu zaman sebelum baligh kot. Kanak-kanak memang lah berakal pendek. Semua yang dibuat atas dasar pengaruh dan keseronokan pada mereka. Bila dah masuk zaman remaja, it's normal to see changes in ourselves. Aku sendiri pun mula berubah sedikit demi sedikit menjadi lebih feminine. But still not fully changed. I didn't have good fashion sense, tak suka pakai kain and fancy2 clothes. I only liked plain clothings. Not much corak yang melambangkan feminine. Tak reti pakai make up, perangai masih kelakian sedikit. Other factors, maybe because I have an elder brother. So much boy influence from him. And maybe sebab tak banyak pendedahan about outside world. 5 tahun duduk terperuk dalam hutan.
Sebab aku jadi feminine ni pun sebab I had crush on boys. Biasa lah kan. Bila nak give impression to people we like, of course nak jaga everything and tak nak malukan diri. Ahahahhahah! Malunya zaman dulu-dulu...:p Unlike other girls, diorang memang dah cukup feminine. Of course lah boys prefer them. Kalau nak dengan aku, mesti diorang rasa amat gay. Sedihnya kalau orang rasa sebegitu kat aku dulu. Mungkin ada. Memang aku dulu dicop perangai macam laki. By Form 5, I think I've almost changed entirely. Dah pandailah sikit berfashion. Adalah kan terfikir bila my mum said, "Awak ni dah besar. Pakailah kemas2, lawa2". After that, terfikir how my mum felt actually. I'm her only daughter. My mum jenis yang melaram. Tiba2 her daughter... Ibarat laki. Awwwwhhhh.... A big disappointment to her perhaps. Kesian la kat dia. At least I've to make her proud. Bukan buat orang katakan yang tak baik kat aku.
You know that moment when my mum and I getting ready to go somewhere, pakai tudung together in front of the mirror and she always betulkan my tudung, and she'll say, "Kan lawa anak ibu...". I knew she was happy. Bila hati dah betul2 terbuka to accept life as a girl, I learned a lot from her. And now I don't have to take a long time to make decisions on what to wear, what clothes that I want to buy. But cara bertudung, tak ada nak ikut sangat fashion yang pelbagai zaman sekarang ni. Fancy sangat bagiku. Ikut my mum's style sudeh...
I really want a collection of this one thing. So this one thing, I started to minat masa Form 5 dulu. My bedmate, Sharifah Zahirah Idid has a lot of jubah Mekah. And bila tengok dia pakai, aaaaahhhhhhh.... SO PRETTY! I WANT ONE!! Jealous sangat! Dah lah got a chance to do Umrah. Then balik sini with macam2! Not only her jubah Mekah. But she brought along something that I called a soul of a true Muslimah. I remember she always bring this small green tafsir al-Quran, English version to class and read whenever there was free time. Untunglah ada bedmate macam dia. Aman sangat hidup. Malah I learned a lot from her.:) Ok. So that one thing is jubah Mekah. I have one. And I want more!! Pernah lah gak menyatakan hasrat untuk memakai purdah kat dia. I think kat luar dia pakai. And I'm currently waiting for my time to come. Insya-Allah.:)
So that was basically how I was before. Not truly a girl. But now, 90% kot. Hehe... I should say what I've gone through has made me become so different from others. Until now, I still have the same inside. Ego tinggi macam laki, kuat pendam perasaan, susah nak tunjuk emosi macam perempuan, tak mudah mengalah, tak terlalu ambil kisah. Generally macam ni. Tak tau lah kalau dengan certain people perangai tu lain. Tak perlulah untuk semua orang merasakan sentuhan hati yang lembut ni. Geli lak cakap macam ni. Tak macho ler... Okay2. Certain2 orang sahaja ok? Limited edition.;) Nanti kalau bagi semua laki rasa, dah jadi macam magnet. Menarik perhatian. Hahahahhah. Gurau ok? Gurau. Takkan jadi macam tu.
Begini caranya pun masih digelar perempuan. Tak perlu jadi perempuan2 yang typical iaitu perempuan yang terlalu gemar dengan fashion zaman sekarang, bertudung tapi masih terbuka sana sini, pakai londeh2, suka snap photos dengan gaya yang menggelikan, gelak ibarat pontianak, jerit2 ibarat kena rasuk, jalan goyang sana goyang sini.(Aku jalan macam spring. Coach aku cakap la. Ok kan?;p) Freaky ok??? Tak teringin nak jadi macam tu! Kalau aku dah rasa macam tu, apa lagi lelaki. Malah aku dah dengar pun apa lelaki rasa about that. Maybe ada perempuan yang tak boleh terima kenyataan ni and menuduh kitorang yang gedik sebab dengar cakap lelaki tapi memang dah betul. Sebaik-baiknya kita cubalah ubah kalau rasa2 dah memang silap. Tak perlu nak mempertahankan apa yang salah. I'm imperfect too but always try to be better.
Akhir kata, walau apa pun perangai seorang perempuan tu, biarlah yang baik2 yang dipamerkan. Perlu ke nak jadi perempuan yang paling cantik dalam dunia ni sampai jadi perhatian semua orang? Tak jealous ok? Sekadar berkata.:) Cantik dalaman, pasti cantik luaran. Sejuk mata memandang. And don't matter what we were used to be, people can change themselves to have a better life. Like how I was, tak perlu lihat zaman silam kerana sekarang dah lain. Lain sangat dari dulu. Macam syllabus sesuatu subjek, zaman sekarang memang tak boleh guna syllabus zaman dulu sebab dah berbeza isinya. Begitulah manusia. And apa perlu dilakukan? Kita terima je apa yang dah disediakan untuk kita seperti syllabus tu. Takkan masih nak guna yang zaman dulu punya syllabus kan? Logic la kan? Girls, watch out! Life's getting even harder for you now. Do what's right and you'll be safe.
Thank you and Assalamualaikum.:)
Girls. People may say that girls are all the same. I don't think so. Me myself a girl but at times I don't really like what other girls do. Boys may define girls as "gedik". Think again. Am I like that? Ahaks! So perasan. If I'm like that, what about girls that are even more "gedik" than me? I think I'm neutral. Neutral in a way saya tidak memihak kepada lelaki atau perempuan walaupun perlu mempertahankan kaum sendiri. Faham maksud saya?
Tidak? Baiklah. Girls. Who doesn't like to be a girl? Bak kata Ustazah Idha, perempuan senang sangat nak masuk syurga, tapi lagi senang nak masuk neraka. At that moment, bila dengar, rasa cuak lah gak. Apa yang perlu dilakukan memanglah senang. Obey Allah, parents, husband, puasa, solat cukup, tutup aurat and etc. Tapi nak jaga amatlah sukar. Even orang yang amat kuat imannya pun boleh tersilap, apatah lagi kita yang masih goyah? Bersikap lembut tapi tak semestinya lemah. Malah perempuan ni amatlah dilindungi. Untung kan? Ada ke perempuan yang melindungi lelaki? Gangster kot perempuan tu. Laki dia wimp.=_=
As for me, Alhamdulilah dilahirkan sebagai seorang perempuan. I always believe in one thing. Girls are all pretty. Allah dah ciptakan semua makhluk-Nya cantik2. So tak perlulah pandang cermin and cakap muka buruk. Instead, say Alhamdulilah! Nak humble tu humble lah gak but tak perlulah until we have low self-esteem. Nak tunjuk muka pun malu sebab kata buruk sangat. Nonsense! Percaya kan even if a girl is not that pretty but she can always be pretty. Tak perlulah secara luaran. Dalaman pun dah cukup. Even when I myself see a girl yang baik sangat perangainya, I'll say she's beautiful. I do envy those people. Trying to be one. Still in the making. Dah lah sopan santun, lemah lembut, senyum setiap masa, perangai pun buat perangai 100% perempuan. Unlike me, I admit I don't behave at times. Yelaa... Ejek orang, kutuk orang, mengumpat, cakap merepek. But cakap merepek is on top of my list. Yang others tu ikut mood lah. Masya-Allah. Tak baiknya aku ni...
But that's the furthest I can go I guess. Alhamdulilah tak ada lah kritikal sangat aku ni, though dulu zaman sekolah rendah, aku ni amatlah tomboy. Kisah benar ni! Rambut potong pendek, pakai seluar pendek, kawan dengan lelaki. Mujurlah itu zaman sebelum baligh kot. Kanak-kanak memang lah berakal pendek. Semua yang dibuat atas dasar pengaruh dan keseronokan pada mereka. Bila dah masuk zaman remaja, it's normal to see changes in ourselves. Aku sendiri pun mula berubah sedikit demi sedikit menjadi lebih feminine. But still not fully changed. I didn't have good fashion sense, tak suka pakai kain and fancy2 clothes. I only liked plain clothings. Not much corak yang melambangkan feminine. Tak reti pakai make up, perangai masih kelakian sedikit. Other factors, maybe because I have an elder brother. So much boy influence from him. And maybe sebab tak banyak pendedahan about outside world. 5 tahun duduk terperuk dalam hutan.
Sebab aku jadi feminine ni pun sebab I had crush on boys. Biasa lah kan. Bila nak give impression to people we like, of course nak jaga everything and tak nak malukan diri. Ahahahhahah! Malunya zaman dulu-dulu...:p Unlike other girls, diorang memang dah cukup feminine. Of course lah boys prefer them. Kalau nak dengan aku, mesti diorang rasa amat gay. Sedihnya kalau orang rasa sebegitu kat aku dulu. Mungkin ada. Memang aku dulu dicop perangai macam laki. By Form 5, I think I've almost changed entirely. Dah pandailah sikit berfashion. Adalah kan terfikir bila my mum said, "Awak ni dah besar. Pakailah kemas2, lawa2". After that, terfikir how my mum felt actually. I'm her only daughter. My mum jenis yang melaram. Tiba2 her daughter... Ibarat laki. Awwwwhhhh.... A big disappointment to her perhaps. Kesian la kat dia. At least I've to make her proud. Bukan buat orang katakan yang tak baik kat aku.
You know that moment when my mum and I getting ready to go somewhere, pakai tudung together in front of the mirror and she always betulkan my tudung, and she'll say, "Kan lawa anak ibu...". I knew she was happy. Bila hati dah betul2 terbuka to accept life as a girl, I learned a lot from her. And now I don't have to take a long time to make decisions on what to wear, what clothes that I want to buy. But cara bertudung, tak ada nak ikut sangat fashion yang pelbagai zaman sekarang ni. Fancy sangat bagiku. Ikut my mum's style sudeh...
I really want a collection of this one thing. So this one thing, I started to minat masa Form 5 dulu. My bedmate, Sharifah Zahirah Idid has a lot of jubah Mekah. And bila tengok dia pakai, aaaaahhhhhhh.... SO PRETTY! I WANT ONE!! Jealous sangat! Dah lah got a chance to do Umrah. Then balik sini with macam2! Not only her jubah Mekah. But she brought along something that I called a soul of a true Muslimah. I remember she always bring this small green tafsir al-Quran, English version to class and read whenever there was free time. Untunglah ada bedmate macam dia. Aman sangat hidup. Malah I learned a lot from her.:) Ok. So that one thing is jubah Mekah. I have one. And I want more!! Pernah lah gak menyatakan hasrat untuk memakai purdah kat dia. I think kat luar dia pakai. And I'm currently waiting for my time to come. Insya-Allah.:)
So that was basically how I was before. Not truly a girl. But now, 90% kot. Hehe... I should say what I've gone through has made me become so different from others. Until now, I still have the same inside. Ego tinggi macam laki, kuat pendam perasaan, susah nak tunjuk emosi macam perempuan, tak mudah mengalah, tak terlalu ambil kisah. Generally macam ni. Tak tau lah kalau dengan certain people perangai tu lain. Tak perlulah untuk semua orang merasakan sentuhan hati yang lembut ni. Geli lak cakap macam ni. Tak macho ler... Okay2. Certain2 orang sahaja ok? Limited edition.;) Nanti kalau bagi semua laki rasa, dah jadi macam magnet. Menarik perhatian. Hahahahhah. Gurau ok? Gurau. Takkan jadi macam tu.
Begini caranya pun masih digelar perempuan. Tak perlu jadi perempuan2 yang typical iaitu perempuan yang terlalu gemar dengan fashion zaman sekarang, bertudung tapi masih terbuka sana sini, pakai londeh2, suka snap photos dengan gaya yang menggelikan, gelak ibarat pontianak, jerit2 ibarat kena rasuk, jalan goyang sana goyang sini.(Aku jalan macam spring. Coach aku cakap la. Ok kan?;p) Freaky ok??? Tak teringin nak jadi macam tu! Kalau aku dah rasa macam tu, apa lagi lelaki. Malah aku dah dengar pun apa lelaki rasa about that. Maybe ada perempuan yang tak boleh terima kenyataan ni and menuduh kitorang yang gedik sebab dengar cakap lelaki tapi memang dah betul. Sebaik-baiknya kita cubalah ubah kalau rasa2 dah memang silap. Tak perlu nak mempertahankan apa yang salah. I'm imperfect too but always try to be better.
Akhir kata, walau apa pun perangai seorang perempuan tu, biarlah yang baik2 yang dipamerkan. Perlu ke nak jadi perempuan yang paling cantik dalam dunia ni sampai jadi perhatian semua orang? Tak jealous ok? Sekadar berkata.:) Cantik dalaman, pasti cantik luaran. Sejuk mata memandang. And don't matter what we were used to be, people can change themselves to have a better life. Like how I was, tak perlu lihat zaman silam kerana sekarang dah lain. Lain sangat dari dulu. Macam syllabus sesuatu subjek, zaman sekarang memang tak boleh guna syllabus zaman dulu sebab dah berbeza isinya. Begitulah manusia. And apa perlu dilakukan? Kita terima je apa yang dah disediakan untuk kita seperti syllabus tu. Takkan masih nak guna yang zaman dulu punya syllabus kan? Logic la kan? Girls, watch out! Life's getting even harder for you now. Do what's right and you'll be safe.
Thank you and Assalamualaikum.:)
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